Saturday, April 10, 2010

Tatterdemalion

I am trying to hear the music again...
Trying to find my land legs...
Trying to find Joy.
JOY
1 a : the emotion evoked by well-being,success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires : delight
b : the expression or exhibition of such emotion : gaiety
2 : a state of happiness or felicity : bliss
3 : a source or cause of delight

This has been a time like no other in my life. Most of us, having reached a certain maturity can claim to have experienced most everything one can imagine, or at least it sometimes feels that way. I think that old cliche' could come into play, just when you think you've seen everything...
I have to say that still, I am quite surprised at this turn in the road my life has taken. It truly is 'the best of times, the worst of times...' Before I digress further, I want to say thank you to all of you and all the ways that you have shown your love and support. This ugly situation can literally make me feel like I've lost my mind, and just about the time I'm ready to believe it's certifiable, one of you come along with a kindness or a word of encouragement and it's powerful, and I am humbled and grateful for your love. I know I've been MIA for a while, mostly I've been sleeping, literally, I will be up for an hour or maybe two if things are well and then this uncontrollable feeling to lay down before I fall down will come over me. I have to say this is disconcerting to me... I feel as if I'm living out a nightmare and praying for it to end...but yesterday afternoon something happened that shook me awake and I'm determined to stay on my feet today. I have much to catch you up on, and I will... but for now, I'm going to leave this as I started, my heart bursting with humbled gratitude for all of you. Thank you. Thank you. All my love. XOXO Keke

4 comments:

The Feathered Nest said...

Oh sweet Keke....I've been following your journey and do know that all things happen for a reason and there MUST be something so much more wonderful around the corner for you....have you seen it yet? Hugs and love, Dawn

Unknown said...

Hey Sweetie. It's so good to see you back. I know it's been so tough. And I also know how that bed and couch can call our name and hypnotize us right to them when we've gone though so much.

Honey I know God has something awesome in mind for you.

Loving you and thinking of you. Hugs...Tracy :)

Suzanne said...

Yayyy! The Queen of Cherry Kingdom is up to something!

Adoringly,
Sue ;0

Patti said...

Glad to see you are back! And the sleeping thing- go with it- it is there for a reason- you must NEED it badly. Thinking of you!